Monthly Archives: September 2013

Pride IS an emotion

28 Saturday Sep 2013

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I learned in a college Social Work class that many people are unable to properly identify their emotions.  Most generally categorize feelings as sad, happy or mad.  Becoming familiar with the other emotions we experience such as frustration, confusion, and concern helps us see the varying degrees of feelings we experience.  Because many emotions are very similar to others, our behavior often doesn’t accurately communicate what we are actually feeling.  For example, when we’re scared we might react in anger:  My young child hides under the clothes rack at the mall and doesn’t come out when I call to him.  After several minutes, he crawls out and I scold him.  My behavior indicates that I am angry with him but I want him to know I was also scared and worried that someone might have taken him.  Or I might have been frustrated because he does this all the time and I have repeatedly instructed him not to do it.

Ephesians 4:26: “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry,”

Emotions are confusing both to the person feeling them and to those we interact with.  We can’t always trust that we’ve interpreted our feelings correctly, but it’s important to know which one we’re experiencing and to understand how we behave in response to each of them.  God reminds us that we are to be in control of our feelings so we avoid the sin that can easily happen during times of heightened emotion.  But it’s difficult to control them unless we know what we are actually dealing with.  I can’t manage my frustration over a procedure at work if I attribute my actual behavior to being angry with a co-worker.

There’s one emotion that we rarely identify correctly or acknowledge:  pride.  One reason it can be tricky is because most of us don’t tend to think of it as an emotion.  I had to look it up to make sure it’s actually considered an emotion, as opposed to a mindset or an attitude.  Psychologists have determined there are two kinds of pride, one negative and one positive.  I would argue that since pride is an emotion, we will experience it in varying degrees, like anger.  Thus, its intensity and how we let it affect our behavior determines whether it is good or bad.  So, like other emotions, we must manage it just as we manage other feelings that can create problems if left unchecked.  If anger isn’t managed, we often end up hurting ourselves and others.  Pride is the same way:  I can have pride in an accomplishment, a belief, my appearance or a lifestyle I have chosen, but when that pride escalates I will make decisions or say things that hurt me and others.

Psalm 10:4:  “In his pride the wicked man does not seek him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God.”

At some point, I realized that pride was the main reason I didn’t commit my life to Christ.  I loved Jesus but I didn’t want “those Christians” to think I was admitting I was wrong.  One of the decisions I made because of this excessive pride was the decision not to attend church.  I didn’t want people to discover how I was living because I didn’t want to change – I didn’t want to admit my lifestyle was wrong and that their lifestyle would be better for me and my family.  I didn’t want to sit and listen to a preacher say things I disagreed with.  Another prideful thought I had that’s surprising is that I didn’t want anyone else to think they knew God better than I did!  Even after my commitment to Jesus, I struggled to attend church because I didn’t want anyone telling tell me I was wrong about something I had learned.  Once I was able to tie these thoughts to pride, I understood the root of my problem and could deal with it.  I literally told myself (I think I actually said it out loud) to accept the fact that there are people out there who know more than I know, who have a closer relationship with God than I do and that it’s time I started learning from them instead of resenting them for it.  I saw how God wanted to use them to help me and I wanted to obey His desire for me to be an active part of His church.

1 John 2:16:  “For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.”

Pride is such a subtle feeling – it doesn’t overwhelm us like anger or sadness yet it can swallow our entire lives because of our unawareness of it. Pride prevents us from doing things we should do and motivates us to do things we wouldn’t do if we would properly identify it.  It just kind of sits back there, conjuring up wrong thinking and providing us with excuses for our bad behavior, disguising itself as a legitimate weapon against others’ perceived efforts to belittle us. We tend to think of it as mostly a positive emotion, so we’re not monitoring it like we do obviously negative emotions. It’s difficult to know when we cross the line with pride.  Since identifying it and working on it in one area of my life, it’s getting easier to see when it’s wreaking havoc in other areas of my life.

Proverbs 11:2: “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.”

I hold a Master’s Degree in Human Resources.  I am proud of earning my degree and for some things I accomplished in the organizations I worked for. But the fact is I worked in the field less than 10 years. As I write this I can feel pride welling up and I really want to give you a bunch of details so you don’t think I’m a failure. I want to tell you about things that happened that were beyond my control so you go away with a positive impression of me. But if I’m keeping my feelings of pride at an acceptable level, I have to tell you about the poor choices I made and the fact that I haven’t followed God’s plan for my life. When I’m in a situation at work where I’m feeling insecure about my abilities or intelligence, I will try to find a way to let others know about my education.  I don’t share this information so they can know a little about me; I share this information because I know it’s something I’ve accomplished that they haven’t, hoping they conclude I might be a little smarter than they are, even when I know that’s not true! I work with some really smart people who have five times more experience than I have, and while I struggle with numerous aspects of our job, most of my co-workers are really good at it.  My pride has led me to make some comments I wish I hadn’t made.  I’ve been caught in lies trying to make sure others don’t view me as inferior to them.  While trying to appear more intelligent by saying things I think MIGHT be true, I just look silly because others know I’m wrong.

Philippians 2:3: “Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves”

I have made a lot of progress in this area, but still have some work to do!  I understand that I can’t use the fact that I have a degree to make myself feel superior to others.  I can’t use it to communicate something about myself that isn’t true.  I have that degree only because God worked in my life to enable me to get it. I must look at my accomplishments as resources He has given me to help others.

James 4:6: “But He gives us more grace.  That is why Scripture says:  “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.””

In areas where I have conquered pride, I find living humbly is a very stress-free, relaxing way to live.  When I allow pride to puff me up, my life quickly becomes a muddled mess! Dealing with pride can be exhausting as I try to keep track of the lies I have told or come to terms with the pain I have caused.  When pride controls me, every situation brings the possibility that I might not come off looking as good as I want to look.  I am learning to find my value in Christ, not what other people think of me or where I think I stand in the world. I am who God made me to be and I have to realize that it often isn’t going to look like what the world says it should look like.  No matter what I’ve accomplished, what I look like, how smart I am, what I have, or what I can do, the world will never be satisfied with it and I will never be fulfilled by any of it. As I think about people I have known, it is the humble ones that I feel great affinity for.  One of Jesus’ most enduring qualities is His humility and His greatest moments were when it was in full display!  Don’t let anyone tell you that being humble is a bad thing.  Moses’ humility was noteworthy enough that God appointed a scribe to add it to His Word and look at all he accomplished!

Numbers 12:3: “(Now Moses was a very humble man, more humble than anyone else on the face of the earth.)

 I want to live humbly.  To do that, I must remember at all times what God has done for me and where I would be without His gift of salvation through Jesus Christ.

Romans 12:3 “For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.”

DISCERNMENT – EXAMINE SCRIPTURE

19 Thursday Sep 2013

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About 30 years ago I started a Bible study that I ordered through the mail.  At the time I wasn’t sure about the beliefs of this particular group and assumed they could be trusted to teach me Biblically sound doctrine  Each lesson included a pamphlet with the actual lesson, an outline I was to fill in, and verses from the Bible I was to read. One week something about the lesson didn’t ring true to me.  I had never studied the Bible so it wasn’t that I read it and knew it wasn’t Biblical.  The more I compared the lesson to what I was reading in the Bible, the more it bothered me.  At some point it said something that very clearly misinterpreted the Scripture it referenced and I knew I was being led down the wrong path.  I threw the lessons away and requested the organization stop sending the lessons.

2 Timothy 4:3-4 “For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths.”

Several years ago I committed my life to Jesus and began listening to preachers on the radio and TV.  One morning I heard a message from Joel Osteen.  At the time I was struggling with managing my money, had a large amount of debt and only a seasonal job.  What Joel was saying was so inspiring because, according to him, all I had to do was believe God would provide me with more money and He would.  Joel Osteen was telling me something I really wanted to believe and I was buying it hook, line and sinker.  I was in real danger of going back to the Santa Claus god I had believed in.

When I told my daughter how encouraged I was by what Mr. Osteen said, she warned me about the prosperity preachers that were becoming popular.  I had never heard of them. I listened more closely to his sermons and finally realized that he wanted me to believe in the power of my faith rather than trusting God.  I’m sure if Mr. Osteen knew about my financial situation he would have blamed my insufficient faith but my faith in God was very strong! I was learning how to lean on God more each day instead of trusting in things of this world.  Through my trial I was discovering God’s commands and how doing things His way was bringing much better results than doing them my way.  The things Mr. Osteen claimed all Christians should do often left me feeling confused (a sure sign something is amiss!). One example was a story about his wife asking him to run to the grocery store so she could finish dinner.  By the time he showered, shaved and put on good clothes, he was too late to get the things she needed so “he enjoyed his TV dinner that night.”  His point in the story was that Christians should always appear in public neatly dressed because of the impression we might leave on others. It bothered me on various levels: his wife’s need for his help was secondary to how he was going to look to other people; he didn’t seem to have any regard for the work she had put into their dinner; he could have quickly washed and put on clean clothes and met his standard while helping his wife; he must judge others by their appearance if he puts that much importance on his own.  The story was like a rock in my shoe.  It just kept coming to my mind and troubled me.

Now, I’m sure this incident bothers me a lot more than it bothered Mrs. Osteen and they were most likely in agreement that Mr. Osteen did the right thing.  It just seems to me he’s got his priorities a little mixed up and I can’t determine what negative message we send when we’re out in public not perfectly dressed. In addition to that confusion, I was disturbed by the minimal amount of time he spent talking specifically about Jesus and sin.  I knew God’s message to His children isn’t about how we can all get rich.  At that point in my life I needed to hear about God’s forgiveness and mercy but wasn’t hearing about either of those things from Joel Osteen.

Colossians 2:8 “See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ.”

 One author said that the theology Mr. Osteen presents is like feeding our spiritual life with nothing but candy.  Hearing only the “good” things about God is not a sufficient spiritual diet.  Learning about how Christians have suffered helps me understand its role in my life and prepares me for those times I’m tested or experiencing the consequences of sin, whether my own or from living in a fallen world.  I have learned that God’s plan for my life is better than whatever plans I have ever had, even when His plans don’t include comfort, wealth or perfect health.  Learning about all of God’s attributes allows me to get to really know Him and have a meaningful relationship with Him.  Even with my limited Bible knowledge, I knew God never promised that every believer would be wealthy and healthy, no matter how much we want to be.  I have learned how I can trust God to help me through whatever troubles I experience in life. He allows trials to make me stronger and help me become the person He needs me to be.  I would never have learned any of these things if I had been given everything my heart desires nor would I have learned about them from Mr. Osteen.

Acts 17:11 “Now these Jews were more noble than those in Thessalonica; they received the word with all eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so”

I had also been listening to Joyce Meyer.  At first, her uplifting, encouraging sermons appealed to me.  Even the name of her TV ministry relieved my itching ears: Enjoying Everyday Life.  For a long time, I didn’t detect much error in Joyce’s sermons.   Then I heard Hank Hanegraaff talking on his radio program “The Bible Answer Man” about one of her sermons and learned that in this particular sermon she changed a word in Scripture so that it meant something entirely different. I looked up the verse and saw Mrs. Meyer’s lie.  I learned the importance of checking the Scriptures after listening to any preacher or teacher.

Proverbs 27:17 “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.”

In another sermon, Joyce expresses no compassion for the paralytic by the pool of Bethesda (John 5:1-47).  In her interpretation, he just lay there suffering for 38 years, doing nothing to help himself.  She questions why, in the span of 38 years, he did not inch his way to the pool so he could roll into it and be healed!  Like Joyce’s analysis of the paralytic, faith preachers would have us believe if we’re suffering in any way our faith simply isn’t strong enough – we’re at fault!  What they’re telling us is we have to have faith in our faith instead of having faith in God. I stopped listening to her because I don’t want to support someone who misleads believers.

 2 John 1:11 – “Anyone who welcomes him shares in his wicked work.”

A few years ago, I was made aware of the belief that Jesus and His family were actually very wealthy.  According to proponents they gained their wealth from the magi that visited Jesus shortly after His birth.  Their theory goes that there had to have been a large number of magi who came to see Jesus after learning of His birth all of whom would have brought expensive gifts to present to the family leaving them very wealthy.  They further the argument by pointing to the fact that Jesus and His disciples had a treasurer (Judas), which, according to them, tells us the group needed someone to manage their large pot of money.  Yet another argument used to support this distortion is based on John 1:39.  Proponents conclude that Jesus invited a large group of followers referred to in previous verses in the chapter to His own home, which would have had to be large to accommodate all of them.  A friend once presented me with some of these points but at the time I couldn’t defend what I believed and realized I had, in fact, simply taken others’ word for it, never taking time to research Scripture to insure I could defend the truth.  I did the research, using Biblically-sound teachers, websites and my concordance to find Scripture to support what I had always believed about Jesus’ poverty.   Take a minute and look up John 1:39 and you will read that Jesus invites only two followers, Andrew and another, possibly John, to follow him to “where He is staying” (not His home).  A cross-reference would include Matthew 8:20 where Jesus tells us He had no place to lay His head. Luke 2:24 can also be used to confirm Jesus’ family was not wealthy.  This verse tells us about Mary’s sacrifice of a pair of doves or two young pigeons required after the birth of a child.  The cross-reference verses in my Bible include Leviticus 12:6-8 which tells us a pair of turtledoves or two young pigeons can be offered by those who cannot afford a lamb sacrifice. Here are four Bible stories I can use to defend the truth of Jesus’ poverty.

Revelation 22:18-19 “I warn everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this book: if anyone adds to them, God will add to him the plagues described in this book, and if anyone takes away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God will take away his share in the tree of life and in the holy city, which are described in this book.”

False teachers understand that the majority of Christians are not reading their Bibles nor taking the time to compare verses and look up background information, impeding their ability to discern truth from lies.  It’s much easier to let them do all the work.  They do not deserve this level of trust.  We have to start holding them accountable and stop using excuses for not being equipped to call them out on their lies.  Any confusion we might experience when studying the Bible will be dispelled if we ask questions, read the notes contained in most Bibles, and look up related verses.  Contradictions disappear when we consider the context of the verses and gain an understanding of the Bible as a whole.

“Context! Context! Context! That’s the antidote to the compromise and to the confusion and to the contradiction of Christ and the Canon. We as Christians need to read the Bible for all its worth, otherwise we are going to be misled by a cacophony of voices that have a siren call that is leading us not towards biblical truth but rather away from biblical truth.” The Bible Answer Man with Hank Hanegraaff, 6/24/2010

It’s important to pray for guidance as we read Scripture and allow the Spirit to show us things in His time.  When I first started studying the Bible, I wanted to immediately understand everything I was reading.  But I took it at God’s pace and allowed Him to show me things in His time.  At first He revealed simple things but with each read-through, I learn more and God reveals deeper truths.

Regular Bible study, researching Scripture, listening to the Spirit, discussing Scripture with other Christians, and reading Biblically sound Christian authors are tools God has provided to help us discern between solid Biblical doctrine and false teaching.  Use a concordance and make use of all the wonderful internet sites that help you find passages based on topics or keywords.  Be sure to check the accuracy of each resource with trusted Christian friends.

Allistair Begg often says “The main things are the plain things.”  There are certainly ideas in the Bible that can be debated, but the main doctrinal points are very clear and non-debatable.  These include original sin; Jesus’s virgin birth, His sinlessness, deity, and humanity; the Trinity; our need for God’s grace; the necessity of faith; Christ’s atoning death, His bodily resurrection and ascension; Christ’s intercessory work for us; and His second coming, final judgment, and reign. (From The Essential Doctrines of the Christian Faith (Part One), Christian Research Institute, Article ID: JAE100-1, By: Norman L. Geisler.)

Discernment takes time, but it is time well spent. We must spend sufficient time in His Word to be able to discern the truth from the lies.  It is no longer an option.

1 Timothy 6:3-5 “If anyone teaches a different doctrine and does not agree with the sound words of our Lord Jesus Christ and the teaching that accords with godliness, he is puffed up with conceit and understands nothing. He has an unhealthy craving for controversy and for quarrels about words, which produce envy, dissension, slander, evil suspicions, and constant friction among people who are depraved in mind and deprived of the truth, imagining that godliness is a means of gain.”

WITHOUT JESUS WE DON’T HAVE GOD

13 Friday Sep 2013

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There’s some site I’ve seen posted a lot recently on Facebook with celebrities proclaiming their faith.  The quotes include comments about reading their Bible and falling on their knees in prayer every day.  Some comment on how they couldn’t get through life without their faith and/or God.  While I do not pretend to know anything about their spiritual lives, I am not convinced they are Christians, if that’s something I’m supposed to take away from the quotes.  Don’t get me wrong; I’m really happy to see that some top celebrities are reading God’s Word.  I would be happier if they would mention Jesus in there somewhere.   

John 14:6-“Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

Many of my friends and family will readily tell me they believe in God.  But the conversation comes to an abrupt halt when I ask them to tell me what they believe about Jesus.  I would venture to guess that most people believe in God and feel He helps them in their lives in some way but they see no need for Jesus.  

I have believed in God all my life. From as far back as I can remember I have felt connected to Him.  I have always known He loves me and I never doubted that He exists.  Jesus was kind of a side item.  I knew in my head that He “died for me,” but didn’t really understand how that affected me.  It was only when I truly understood who Jesus is that God began to have a real impact in my life.  My spiritual life went from a bunch of beliefs, most of which I made up, to the reality of God.  He went from being a distant spiritual being to a living presence.  My impression of God shifted from a demanding Father to a loving one.  In their commentary “The Fourfold Gospel” J. W. McGarvey and Phillip Y. Pendleton write:  “Nature shows God above us; the Law shows God against us; but the Gospel shows God with us, and for us.”     

As I studied the Bible I could see the big picture of the world; how events in the Old Testament all led up to Christ and how the world as we know it will end with His return.  I no longer fear the world because it is no longer a random bunch of happenings.  While we are subject to man’s depravities in the short-term, God has ultimate control and will take it back in the end.  I find great comfort in that.  I also find comfort in knowing He has a reason for every single human being, including me.  God had a plan for me even before I was born.  Life is no longer about me; it is now about serving God and leading others to Jesus.  The hopelessness is gone and I have new resources to help me manage the sadness I have always felt.

 God provided the law to the Israelites as a way for them to live to set themselves apart from other people, to show their love for Him through obedience, and to acknowledge their need for His forgiveness of their sins.  There were rituals, sacrifices and laws that they strived to obey. These were external symbols God used to illustrate His authority, His direction on how we are to live, and the requirement to pay a price for sin.  They foreshadowed Jesus.  Once He died and was resurrected, the need for these things went away.  Because of Jesus, I don’t have to DO anything for God’s forgiveness.  It’s hard to fathom that God offers this kind of rescue to us.  All I have to do is know that Jesus is who He said He is (God).  Until I fully grasped what God did in the person of Jesus I depended on successfully obeying a bunch of rules to insure I received God’s forgiveness and blessings.  And that’s why I viewed life as so hopeless. 

Each time I failed God I sank deeper and deeper in an abyss.  At some point, I gave up trying and convinced myself that God really didn’t care how I lived. In my belief system, God didn’t require anything of me; I call Him my Santa Claus god because I decided to believe He existed only to give me the things I needed and the things I wanted.  But deep down I knew I was wrong and I was engaged in a never-ending mental wrestling match.  A summary of my thoughts might go something like this:

If I’m good for a while, then I mess up, will God give me a second chance?  I hope He loves me enough to give me a third, fourth and fifth chance.  There has to be a line to cross where God says “enough is enough” and He’s done with us. How does God determine when we cross that line? Is He comparing me to Mother Theresa, the Pope, my grandma, maybe Oprah?   For every bad thing I do, must I do something good to even up my score or can I assume it only takes one really good thing to make up for lots of kind-of-bad things?  What if I forget something bad I did and don’t make up for it?  If I find a number of people who don’t view what I did as bad can I cross it off my list?  What if I die right after a bad deed and don’t get a chance to do the good thing I intended to do to make up for it?  Does the intent to do good count or do I actually have to do it?  Is God keeping a tally sheet of my sins?  Even my thoughts are bad – there’s not enough time in the day to do a good thing for every bad thought I have!

It was mentally and emotionally exhausting and as the failures piled up the harder it was to see a way out!  I was fighting a losing battle.  Then God led me to an understanding of what He did in the person of Jesus.  I learned that my perception of God and Jesus as being separate was wrong; God is three persons yet one.  This is a difficult concept to grasp, but I accepted it by faith.  I don’t have to understand it I just have to know it’s true.  I learned that there’s nothing I can do to earn God’s forgiveness; Jesus did all that needed to be done.  I learned what grace is and I learned what God’s mercy is: God gives me what I don’t deserve (forgiveness) and He refrains from giving me what I do deserve (punishment).  It’s so simple, yet so complicated.  But this new understanding freed me from constantly looking back and drowning in my past.  It gave me a way to show God I love Him simply by putting forth a sincere effort to do what He asks. 

I’m not suggesting that once I figured out what God did in the person of Jesus all my problems disappeared.  But it was the beginning of a life that allowed me to move forward, assured I was forgiven for all my poor choices; it enabled me to wake up each morning knowing I have a clean slate in God’s eyes.  Life is still difficult.  In some ways it’s even harder.  But with Jesus there’s hope.  It’s not a constant fight to live up to an unattainable standard.  Now that I know Jesus, the Spirit dwells in me, the other person that God is while still being God.  That’s what I didn’t understand before.  And that is where I found hope where I saw none before.  I’m not alone in this.

John 14:17 – “…even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him. You know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you.”

It’s frustrating when non-believers relegate my experience as merely a belief or adopting a religion. The God that created this universe dwells in me.  When I fully understood that, it overwhelmed me. I cried and I repeated the idea over and over in my head, trying to wrap my brain around it.  It still amazes me.  I’ve tried to come up with a way to explain the experience.  In the commentary The Fourfold Gospel (McGarvey and Pendelton) there is a comment regarding Luke 1:15 that says “the stimulation of the Spirit is elsewhere thus contrasted with alcoholic stimulants.”  I’ve considered explaining the experience by comparing it to drinking alcohol, but thought it a bit irreverent.  Seeing it in print by accomplished Christian authors assured me it’s OK to use the analogy.  If I were to tell someone who has never drank alcohol the way they will feel and the things they might do if they consume several drinks, they might not believe me.  But once they start drinking, they will find it to be a real experience.  The Spirit indwelling me is the same way.  It wasn’t a response to something I read nor was it a mere decision to accept a particular doctrine.  It is as real as the experience I have when I drink alcohol.  When I began leaning on His power instead of going it alone, I was able to rid my life of so many harmful habits and behaviors. That’s the difference Jesus has made. 

John 16:7  – “Nevertheless, I tell you the truth: it is to your advantage that I go away, for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you. But if I go, I will send him to you.

Jesus’ disciples begged Him to stay but He assured them His leaving was for their good.  Jesus died so we can have a personal relationship with God and that relationship can exist because the Spirit dwells in us.  There can be no closer relationship.  And the only way to receive the Spirit is through the re-birth we experience when we accept what Jesus did for us on the cross.  Only as a believer of Jesus are we counted as one of God’s children. 

Simply put, without Jesus, you don’t have God.  It grieves me when people claim a faith that includes God but they don’t see a need for Jesus.  They will not spend eternity with God, and they will miss blessings God wants to give them in this life.  God has given us the responsibility of helping others understand who Jesus is.  It’s hard to do in the culture that exists today.  Not only is it a narrow gate to God, He tells us few will find it. 

Matthew 7:14 – “For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.”

“Imperfect knowledge of Him troubles, but perfect knowledge and love cast out fear.” (I John 4:18 partial paraphrase in The Fourfold Gospel, McGarvey and Pendleton)

SHIFTING SAND AND SOLID ROCK

06 Friday Sep 2013

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Malachi 3:6 “For I am the Lord, I do not change….”

My grandson and I built a sand castle the other day. We placed a dragon on the rim of the sandbox, a solid piece of plastic.  The dragon stayed put until one of us moved it.  But as we placed the princess and knight on top of the sand castle, it collapsed, sending our figures tumbling to the bottom. We re-built the castle, trying to make it more solid, but watched as it collapsed several more times.  My life before I committed it to God was like our sandbox play.  I based it on ideas, values and beliefs that shifted regularly and was always on the brink of collapse, much like the sand castle.  I was often rebuilding areas of my life, always hoping to be stronger the next time around.  Looking back, my life could also be symbolized by a boat on the water in the middle of a storm, tossing me to and fro.  Unlike the verse below, I had nothing solid to grasp hold of and I fell.

Matt 7:25 – “ The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.”

At one point, I decided the chaos in my life was a result of my inability to find work that was fulfilling.  I concluded that everything in my life would fall neatly into place and the sadness would go away if I had a job that I enjoyed.  With great anticipation, I returned to college to finish my bachelor’s degree.  I began studying business and marketing because I was working at a bank.  The summer before my senior year I became disillusioned with the business world so I switched majors and studied Social Work, thinking I would enjoy working more if I could help others while earning a living.  I worked in that field for a few years but struggled to navigate my way around a system that seemed to cause more problems than it solved for those it was set up to help.   In response to that frustration, I went back to school for a Master’s degree.  Based on the advice of a career counselor, I studied Business Administration and Human Resources.  I was about half-way through my courses when I read with dismay that companies were cutting their Human Resources department to save money.  I managed to find jobs and worked in the field about 9 years, learning some very hard lessons about the business world, most importantly that I don’t have what it takes to function successfully in that world.  I spent those 9 years constantly looking for the next job for a variety of reasons:  I wanted one that would pay more, I wanted to work closer to home, I wanted a job that had better hours, I wanted to work with people who shared my values.  How I made decisions about my career was constantly shifting as I tried to fill a void or meet ever-changing cultural demands.

I managed to get a job making almost six figures.  I was confident in my work, knew what needed to be done to insure my organization was in compliance with employment laws.  I worked at making processes more efficient, despite great resistance from those more comfortable with the antiquated methods they had been using for more than 30 years. Despite a lack of support and direction from my boss I managed to implement a number of programs that would benefit our employees.  It appeared I had achieved everything I set out to do, but there was still a lingering sadness, the void would not be filled.  Every morning I had to encourage myself to somehow get through the day.  I didn’t see any way out.  I knew there would be no other jobs that would pay what this one paid.  The economy was getting worse and jobs were disappearing.  I stayed and focused on doing my job.  Then one day my boss walked in and told me the decision had been made to let me go.  No warning, no indication that there were any problems – the announcement was totally unexpected.  But there it was – the sand castle had collapsed.

I went through a period of grieving.  I had built my life around having a successful career and now it was gone.  Losing that job was one of the events in my life that God used to begin drawing me to Him.  My work life was one of the first areas I let go of, determined to follow God’s direction this time instead of my plans.  He opened the door to a job that I would have never considered.  If His prompting had not been so clear, I might have passed it up because it was a job much like those I had before I went back to college and it required knowledge in an area I had no confidence in.  But I no longer trusted the worldly things I had been using to make decisions.  I had begun to read my Bible each day and told God I would try it His way.  I was learning the immensity of God’s love for me and that He knows me better than I know myself.  I had given up the “Santa Claus God” I grew up believing in and learned that God’s plans don’t always include a lot of money or success as the world defines it.  I was very excited to see how He was going to use me when I lived His way and I stopped fearing what would happen if I didn’t follow the world’s rules.  I no longer had to worry about all of the things that could change and affect my decisions.  The things God used to develop His plan for my life don’t shift and change; they’re not based on things like the economy, what others think, or my feelings.  His direction is rock solid.  I am more content in my work than I ever imagined I could be.  The amazing thing is He led me right back where I was before I took off in my own direction!

Psalm 146:3 – “Put not your trust in princes, in a son of man, in whom there is no help.”

As I think about building my life on God’s firm foundation, I sometimes question why some days are so hard.  I’ve come to the conclusion that relying on God’s solid foundation is a lifestyle that’s built on day-to-day choices.  Too often, I find myself back on sand in order to get through a tough day or a small crisis.  I tend to seek immediate relief instead of focusing on what God would have me do.  In my panic I don’t trust God, looking instead to advice from friends or family without checking it against God’s direction.  I wait for my feelings to change or I seek approval or comfort from the world.  It’s nice to have someone validate my feelings, especially when I’ve been wronged in some way, so it’s often hard to admit my role in a struggle; easier to accept the misplaced encouragement I receive when I reach out to others, painting a picture that may or may not resemble the actual situation.  Getting support from others is good and I know God wants me to build relationships with other Christians.  The problem comes when I don’t check their advice or their encouragements against God’s direction.   

These small “sand castles” can easily become so gratifying that we don’t realize we’re becoming dependent on them instead of taking things to God.  When we don’t seek to do His will in every situation, when we allow worldly choices to override the Spirit’s direction, we run the risk of building our lives on sand, one situation at a time.  Who or what do we turn to in those moments when our day becomes complicated or difficult?  What are we depending on to rescue us from an immediate fear or sorrow?  Where do we look to feel valued?  In the long-term I believe I have given all this over to God, but as I consider how I handle these things in the short-term, I often find myself on shaky ground. 

I love beautiful, sunny Saturday mornings – no obligations; I can choose to do whatever I want to do after working all week.  I’m always tempted to get in my car and go to my favorite store and buy stuff.  Any stuff will do: clothes, food, things for my grandchildren.  In deciding what to buy or whether to buy anything at all, I used to waver back and forth, debating on whether to spend the last of the money in my checking account or, if there wasn’t much, asking my husband for some money or using my credit card.  I could void the check to the church that I hadn’t put in the offering plate yet.  Human nature allows us to justify and rationalize and that’s what I did as I drove to the stores.   I had committed to managing my money the way God directs us but after ignoring what I knew His will was in regards to my “Saturday morning temptation” a few too many times, I found myself justifying my actions and doing the questionable checkbook math I used to do to alleviate the guilt of spending more than I should.  I soon stopped giving to my church and used my credit card again, a habit I had managed to break.  I was beginning to experience the hopelessness I felt at being a slave to this habit and prayed for God to help me see the way out I knew He would provide and was soon back on track.  When Saturday morning rolls around, I remind myself of God’s direction about money and material things.  God doesn’t want me to be indebted to others; He wants me to be responsible with all that He has blessed me with and He doesn’t want me to find happiness in material things or to be covetous.  Based on His direction, only when I’ve been responsible with my money and prioritized my spending according to His will, can I buy something with whatever CASH I have left.  If I haven’t handled my money as responsibly as I feel God is leading me, buying something is off the table.  Decisions based on God’s direction are rock solid, clear and concise, and so freeing!

It’s easy to allow the world to gain authority over our day-to-day decisions as we seek to satisfy our desires or alleviate pain as quickly as possible.  People who seem to care one day may not be there for us when they feel we’re too much of a burden.  Ideas that the culture accepts last a few years then we’re off in a completely different direction.  What’s considered to be right or wrong changes as often as the direction of the wind changes.  In contrast, God’s commandments tell us clearly what not to do or what to do and they haven’t changed since God handed the basic Ten to Moses thousands of years ago!

Stay connected to God by reading His Word every day, talking to Him regularly throughout the day, listening to good praise music whenever possible, and sitting in silence to “hear” Him.  Before you act, react, or make a decision, consult Him – check it against His direction.  Even the solid rock we’ve built our life on will shift if we get enough sand under it!

Psalm 111:7,8 – “…; All His precepts are sure.  They stand fast forever and ever, and are done in truth and uprightness.”

Psalm 119:4 “You have commanded us to keep Your precepts diligently.”

Psalm 119:165 “Great peace have those who love Your law….”